Just Barely ANBU
by Aku Knight
Summary: After the War, Tsunade drafts Naruto into the ANBU for remedial training. It's too bad Naruto has no intention for making things easy for anyone.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto, and the fact is I probably never will, and if you're reading this, you probably never will either. It's kind of like we're family, because we don't own shit together. At least that's what I tell myself. It's kind of sad to admit, but what are you gonna do?

Chapter 1: How the Story Began

_**Just Barely ANBU **_

It was around 9 in the morning when Naruto was woken up from his sleep by a messenger hawk that refused to allow him to go back to sleep. The hawk had landed on his pillow and began to peck his head.

"Arrrgggh! Alright I'm awake now." Naruto muttered as he finally stretched in his bed before reaching for the note attached to the hawk. The hawk lifted its right leg to allow him to remove the note attached to his leg.

"Awww, you're not so bad when you're not pecking my head and being douche." Naruto murmured softly as he began to pat the head of the hawk. Almost as if responding to being called a douche, the hawk let out a loud cry before shitting on Naruto's bed and flying out of the open window. Naruto quickly got up from his bed and chased the bird to his window. "I take back what I said about you, you really are a douche!" Naruto yelled angrily out of his open window towards the bird that was getting farther and farther away.

"Hey Shut up, ya damn lunatic!" yelled one of his neighbors on a lower floor. "Some of us are trying to sleep here." He continued obviously upset at being awoken from his slumber. "You Shut up! You're making more noise than me ya asshole!" Naruto responded in kind. This was starting out to be a shitty day in his opinion. After realizing that the disturbed man wasn't going to continue their impromptu shouting match, Naruto closed the window and finally read the note that had started his day off so badly.

"_Naruto I know you're probably still sleeping, but I need you to report to my office by 12. There is something important I need to discuss with you." _

"Hmmm, I wonder what Baa-Chan wants?" Naruto wondered out loud as he scratched his head in confusion. It had been a while since Tsunade had called him into her office now that things had cooled off in the Elemental Nations. It had been about 4 months since the Fourth Great War had ended. Madara had escaped after being gravely injured due to a combined effort from Team 7, the 5 Kages, and Obito to finally defeat him. However the victory was not without cost. Obito and the Onoki the Tsuchikage had succumbed to their injuries and died on the battlefield. Kakashi had slipped into coma due to the overuse of his Sharigan, and the rest were either too injured or too tired to chase after the retreating Madara. During the confusion of battle, Orochimaru and the rest of Sasuke's team managed to disappear without a trace. Well, not all of Sasuke's team, Karin and decided to follow Sasuke back to Konoha much to Sasuke's annoyance.

"Well at least things have gotten much better since then." He spoke aloud to himself. And it had. Kakashi had woken from coma two months and had resumed active duty. Sai had replaced Neji on team Gai and had seemed to bond well with Lee for some odd reason. Sasuke had just been released from the ANBU holding cell last month, and was on a 6-month probation. Naruto had claimed responsibility for Sasuke upon his release, and had assured the council that Sasuke was no longer a threat.

Naruto made his way to the bathroom to get ready for the day and decided to wake Kurama up.

"_Hey Kurama. Are you up yet?"_

"**I am now! Now what do you want Naruto?" **Kurama snorted before deciding he really didn't care what Naruto wanted because he wanted to go back to sleep. "**Never mind, I'm going back to sleep."**

"_Sheesh, I forgot you weren't exactly a morning person….or a person for that matter. I have to go meet Baa-Chan for a meeting and I wanted you to be ready in case we're sent on a mission."_

"**Naruto, when was the last time you had to use my charka to defeat an enemy? Sage mode is enough. Now let me go back to sleep or next time you come into the seal I'll eat you!" **

"_Nah, you really wouldn't eat right Kurama?...Kurama, a little assurance would be great right about now!"_

XXXXXXXXXX

After leaving his apartment, Naruto realized he had about an hour left before he had to meet Tsunade and decided to get some ramen for breakfast.

"Hey old man. I'll have my usual." Naruto yelled as he entered the small restaurant and sat on his favorite stool in the middle.

"Well if it isn't our favorite hero! Ayame, fire-up the Uzumaki special!" Teuchi yelled from the backroom as he approached the counter. "It's been too long since I last saw you in here Naruto. Where did you disappear to?"

"I was in here three days ago old man! Is your memory failing you already?" Naruto laughed as he shifted himself forward to better smell the ramen Ayame was cooking in the back.

"I know that!" Replied Teuchi "It's just that three days is a long time to go without ramen for you. You've actually been eating a lot less ramen lately now that I think about it. It's a bit unusual and unhealthy if you ask me!"

Naruto suddenly became depressed as he told Teuchi why he had been missing out on his sweet, mouth-watering ramen lately. "It's Sakura-chan." Naruto mumbled as he began to shift uncomfortably in his as if seeing if the Sakura was nearby.

"Sakura-chan said that I eat too much ramen! What the hell is too much ramen anyway!?" Naruto suddenly shot up from his seat startling the other customers near him. "We fought in the Fourth Great Ninja War to protect the freedom of the great people of Kohona." As he continued to speak, he placed his hands on his hips and took on a more heroic pose. His speech started to gather the attention of people outside the shop. "We fought tooth and nail against the enemy. Fought back to back with our fellow comrades for peace, justice, and freedom. The freedom to sleep past 9am without a bird shitting on my bed. To walk around naked in my own house. And most importantly to eat ramen whenever I damn well please. And do you know why?" Naruto voiced his question to the amused crowd that had started to gather around him.

"Tell us why!" One civilian yelled from within the crowd.

"I'll tell you why random dude" Naruto started speaking again as a fire lit in his eyes. "Because I am a man! So what if ramen is the reason I was so short years ago, and eating it will probably cause me to remain at this height for the rest of my life." Naruto then turned his back to the crowd as he finished his long winded rant. "That is what it means to be a man. Plus Sakura-chan should look in the mirror before complaining about my eating habits." At this point the crowd started to disperse after listening to the assuming rant of their local hero.

"All she eats are those disgusting jam paste things anyway. They won't help your breast grow either Sakura-chan." Naruto placed his hands on his chest and cupped his chest, to better emphasis the lack of breasts on Sakura he was accustomed to seeing.

"Could you repeat that last part again?"

"Sure, I said Sakura-Chan's brea….. oh shit!" Naruto yelled as he finally turned around to see who had asked him that question.

Sakura Haruno was currently not in a good a mood today. First, one of her favorite elderly patients had died due to a bout of incompetence from one of the medical staff. The idiot had mixed up the medication for two different patients… that weren't even on the same floor, or the same side of the building for that matter. That idiot had been ejected from the building…painfully. Next, another patient decided that today was the day he would feel her up. He was admitted for a broken leg a month ago, and now that he decided to be a pervert, he was now comatose due to the ass-kicking she gave him when he groped her ass. So imagine her surprise when she finally left the hospital to get some lunch when she heard Naruto's voice from down the street. Deciding to see what her best friend was up to, she caught him cupping his breasts and complaining about the lack of her own. Suffice to say, she was not happy.

"So Naruto, what do you have to say for yourself?" Her voice was eerily calm as she put her hands in her white lab coat and began to put on her black gloves. "And pick your words carefully, because the next time you see me is when I'll be bringing you back to life after I cave your face in." Sakura smiled sweetly as if she had just been giving a bouquet of flowers.

"Wait Sakura!" Naruto suddenly said as he put his left hand forward to halt her advance. Naruto's face suddenly took on a serious expression as he looked her in the eyes.

"W-what is it Naruto? As Sakura stammered and blushed lightly at the intense look he was giving her.

"Can you wait like 10 minutes?" Naruto stated as he turned around to point at the fresh bowl of ramen that was just placed on his spot by Ayame. Naruto's expression returned to his normal sheepish one as he explained his reasoning. "Ramen is best eaten hot after all!"

Sakura's jaw-dropped as he ignored her raising anger, and began to eat his food with a smile on his face. "NA~RU~TO!"

"_Well it was worth a shot_" Naruto thought to himself he turned around to face a red faced Sakura. "….Just please, not the face."

*WHAM*

"…..It's always the face!"

XXXXXXXXXXXX

It was almost noon before Naruto finally left Ichiraku, with Sakura right next to him. After giving him a black eye, Sakura decided to spend her lunch with him, and vent about her day. After lunch, Sakura then followed Naruto towards the Hokage tower, after he told her that Tsunade had requested his presence at 12. She told him that she needed to see the Hokage anyway, so they might as well go together. As they walked up the stairs of the tower, and greeted the secretary in front of the large oak doors of the Hokage's office, Naruto made motions indicating that he planned to kick down the doors before storming in. Sakura quickly put a stop to that plan.

"What the hell are you Baka!?" Sakura hissed loudly as she grabbed Naruto back the back of his jumpsuit preventing him from carrying out his previous intention of kicking down the door.

"Well, I was about to make a dramatic entrance until you ruined that. Thanks a lot Sakura-chan." Naruto grumbled before giving his teammate a sour look. Sakura merely gave him a blank look before she first knocked on the door, and then opened it like a normal person.

Tsunade was at her desk playing with Tonton when she noticed her guests. "Ah Naruto just on time. And no dramatic entrances today?" She smirked as she watched Tonton run towards Naruto who scooped her up. "And Sakura, what are you doing here?"

"Good afternoon Tsunade-Sama. I just saw Naruto after getting some lunch, and he looked like he could use the company, so I came."

Naruto jaw dropped after he heard the lie that came out of his friend's mouth. "But that's not what you… Argh dammit that hurt!" Naruto hissed as he removed Sakura's hand from pinching his side. Then Naruto's face took on a knowing look as he gave Sakura a one armed hug. "If you just wanted to spend some time with me, why didn't you just say so?"

Sakura started to blush as she began to splutter out an excuse. Fortunately for her Tsunade decided that now was the best time to start the meeting. "So if you guys are done with… well whatever you guys are doing, there is a reason why I called you her Naruto." Tsunade laughed as she saw Sakura's glare in her direction.

"Ok, whatcha call me down here for Baa-Chan?" Naruto asked as he removed himself from Sakura, and began petting Tonton.

"Well Naruto," she continued as she ignored his nickname for her, "I want you to join ANBU"

"….. You want me to what now?"

**So that's it for the first Chapter. This is also my first Fanfic, so any kind of review is appreciated. This story was Inspired by Shezza's** **Life in Konoha's ANBU. ****If you get the chance you should read that. It's a beautiful mix of a fantastic storyline, and comedy. This fic, will focus more on humor, but If enough people want a more serious storyline, and my humor is dry, then I'll focus more on the story. Till next time. **


	2. Chapter 2: The recruitment

Disclaimer: Do I really have to write these for every chapter? I mean, I highly doubt that anyone that owns a successful manga wirtes fanfics during their spare time. This sort of thing only depresses me… well, on to the next chapter.

Chapter two: The recruitment

_**Just Barely ANBU **_

"….You want me to what now?" Naruto asked as he looked at the Hokage with a blank expression. "I think a little bit of "stupid" just came out of your mouth."

Tsunade hurled the first thing she spotted straight towards Naruto's head.

"That hurt you old- ouch dammit. Ok I'll stop." Naruto rubbed his second black eye as the second object Tsunade threw at him was a steel paperweight.

"Now that you've come to your senses," Tsunade smirked as she continued where she left-off before she was interrupted. "I want you to join ANBU… sort off."

Sakura, who had been watching this conversation quietly finally decided to interrupt. "Why would you want Naruto to join ANBU Tsunade-Sama? And what do you mean by sort of?" Sakura asked as she stood next to an equally confused Naruto. At one point of time, being asked to enter ANBU was a great honor, it still was, but for ninja like Naruto it seemed completely pointless. Naruto was already the one of the most powerful ninja in the entire Elemental Nations. Aside from that, Naruto's techniques weren't exactly what you would call subtle. Apparently what Sakura was thinking when she asked her question was apparent enough that Tsunade laughed before answering her question.

"I know what you're thinking Sakura, and under normal circumstances you would be right. This however, is another matter entirely." Tsunade stood from her seat and walked towards the large glass windows of her office. The view was breath-taking, and you could see the stone faces of the 5 Hokages on the mountain side as clear as day.

"_Thank God they never had the time to put Danzo's ugly mug up their before he died. I would have had to barricade all the windows in the office."_ Tsunade thought with a sour expression on her face. She decided to continue where she left-off before she was distracted by her thoughts. "Do you know what I see when I look outside and see the Hokage Mountain?"

"Four awesome ninja and an old hag~ Ouch! Dammit, we really need to take about your violent tendencies towards me Sakura-Chan!" Naruto squawked as he dodged another hit from Sakura for him insulting her mentor. "Where's the love?"

Tsunade smiled as see turned around to see the commotion behind. "I knew there was a reason I liked her so much" She mumbled before coughing into her fist to break-up their interaction. "No you disrespectful little brat, I see something much more than three old men, a young brat, and a beautiful princess on that mountain."

"That's not what I said!"

"If you say one more word Naruto I'll pull your tongue through your ass. Yeah, think about how I'll do that and keep quiet." Tsunade said calmly. But no one was fooled. Both Naruto and Sakura noticed the trembling fist, and the tick mark on her forehead. Naruto decided to make a healthy decision, he kept quiet.

"Now, back to the topic at hand," Tsunade smirked victoriously as Naruto began to turn pale as the threat sank in. "To answer your question Sakura, I want Naruto to join the ANBU for remedial training."

"Oi, I'm one of the most kick-ass ninja of my generation. The hell do I need to go for re-re… that training for anyway!" Naruto shouted as he shook his fist at the woman he saw as a mother figure. He knew what remedial training was, he heard that word appear many times when his grades were brought up in the academy.

"And to answer your second question Sakura," Tsunade continued as if she hadn't heard him "Naruto's current status and techniques are too… unique to grant him the anonymity that is usually synonymous with ninja associated in ANBU, however, the program I have in mind with rectify that problem."

"Oh! I understand now." Sakura nodded with a slight smile on her face as finally understood what her master's intentions were. "You want him to become well rounded, and introduce with a new set of ninja he's never worked with before." Many ninja, if not all the ninja knew of Naruto especially after the Pein incident, but not many of them actually knew him. They respected him, and some even feared him. Naruto's previous treatment by the village wasn't exactly a well kept secret, so some are worried he might extract revenge now that he has the power to do so. It was a ridiculous thought. Those that knew Naruto knew that he wasn't one for master plans… or even regular plans. With Naruto, what you see is what you get.

While Sakura was processing all of this information, a confused Naruto finally decided to voice his complaints.

"You guys do know I'm right here right!?" Naruto yelled as he pointed his finger at Tsunade who was waiting patiently for the out-burst to occur. "What's really going on here? I may not have understood everything you guys were talking about, but even I know that ANBU probably isn't the best for me right now." Naruto had stopped yelling at this point, and placed Tonton on the floor while he crossed his arms waiting for Tsunade to answer his question.

Tsunade smiled softly and nodded before she walked over to her desk and reached down to open her bottom drawer. Inside the drawer was a dark brown book that she grabbed and threw to Naruto across the room. "Open the book to page 36, and then I'll answer your question"

Naruto caught the book with the ease of a well trained ninja and stared at the cover. The words "New Edition Bingo book, Vol. 12" were scrawled in big bold letters. Suddenly Naruto began flipping through the pages with a new found excitement as he realized why Tsunade had given him that book.

"Oh, yeah! I can't wait to see what kind of badass nickname they gave me. Oh, oh, and Im probably like a triple SSS rank threat. Something like "Bow down to awesomeness before fleeing on sight." Naruto began mumbling with feverish excitement as he finally reached his page and began to read.

"… Oi, What the Hell is this!?" Naruto yelled at the top of his lungs before walking over to the nearest table and flipping it over. "This has gotta be a joke or something, right Baa-Chan?"

"Really, was flipping my coffee table over really necessary?" Tsunade gave him a deadpan look as she saw the mess he made with his little outburst. "Whose gonna clean that up?"

"…Sorry." Naruto murmured as he rubbed his head sheepishly. "But the table at my house is to nice to flip over, and I kinda always wanted to do that you know?"

"Why did you flip out like that in the first place Naruto? It just a basic Shinobi alias, let me see that." Sakura then reached over and snatched the bingo book from Naruto's hand. She opened the page and began to read out loud.

_Bingo Book Entry: _

_Name: Naruto Uzumaki_

_Age: 17_

_Village affiliation: Konoha_

_Rank: Genin_

_Basic threat level: C?_

_Alias: Naruto Anzen orenji no chakuyo (Naruto wearer of Safety Orange)_

_Basic information: Naruto Uzumaki mainly relies on melee attacks and is very dangerous over long-period battles. He also seems to have the ability to sway enemies into becoming allies, however, said enemies usually die not to long afterwards so that ability is nearly useless. However, he is also a Jinchuuriki that has mastered both the beast's charka, and sage energy. He takes on any appearance physical changes such as red eye-liner or he starts glowing his trade-mark nickname, then flee… really, run real fast in the opposite direction._

_Basic abilities: Rasengan, Shadow clone Justu, Summing Justu…(That's about it…He kinda sucks right?)_

Sakura turned red as she held in her laughter after reading the Bing book entry. Naruto was very upset now, it wouldn't be nice to laugh in his face right now… she would do that when she got home.

Naruto face took on a very distraught look as he saw his teammate holding in her laughter. "You see," he began yelling again, "what kind of half-assed entry is that!? That asshole even wrote all those side comments about my Justu! He made me sound like a complete scrub!"

"He even got my rank and threat level wrong!" Naruto continued, clearly still upset with what he read in the bingo book. "And the worst part was my new "alias". Safety Orange! What's wrong with wearing orange? I still kicked Madara's ass while wearing orange didn't I?"

As Naruto continued ranting, Sakura's cheeks puffed up after each statement, until finally

"Gwhahahaha."

"Sakura-Chan… it's not funny… it's really not funny." Naruto whined as his teammate held her stomach as she continued to laugh.

Sakura's laughter finally subsided as she looked down with a small amount of embarrassment and shame. She didn't really mean to laugh like that, it's just after everything he did, some asshole decided to give him a C? Threat level and a stupid alias.

"Uh Tsunade-sama, what's with the C? Threat level. I've never seen that before." Sakura decided now was the best time to ask her question, since Naruto was still ranting about how unfair life was.

"Actually it means Naruto's base abilities start at a solid C rank, but then shoot up depending on the situation." Tsunade explained with a straight face… she had already laughed her ass off before the meeting. Actually, to be truthful, Tsunade had shown most of the staff in the Hokage tower Naruto's bingo entry. If he found out, he would not be happy. "You see, most ninja don't have the ability to suddenly increase their ability during battle. And in Naruto's case, he jumps from veteran Genin to Double SS rank threat in mid-battle." Tsunade shrugged her shoulders as if she was confused too. "And that's why I drafted you into ANBU effective tomorrow." Tsunade smirked as she finished her explanation.

"And how exactly will drafting me into ANBU help remove this…this shit stain on my reputation?" Naruto asked as he finally calmed down enough to listen to the words of his mother figure.

"Naruto, the truth is while you're very powerful," Tsunade paused as she watched him puff up is chest with pride "the truth is your ninjustu is very basic." She smirked as she brought his head out of his ass. "A much less powerful ninja can take you out under certain circumstances. I mean to rectify that problem with this program." By now, Tsunade had walked over to Naruto and slung an arm over his shoulders is a familiar manner.

"Hmmm, I guess you have a point." Naruto conceded as he finally relaxed. "If it can make me have a better chance of being Hokage, I guess… wait a second!" Naruto paused as he finally recalled something Tsunade said earlier. "What do you mean I start tomorrow!? You all ready enrolled me didn't you?"

"Well… yeah, I guess I did." Tsunade shrugged as if she a picked a different food on a dinner menu as opposed to playing with his life.

"Then what was the whole point of this meeting!? Wouldn't it have been easy if you just to me to report tomorrow morning?"

"… Well what do you know, you're right. It would have been easier." Tsunade mumbled as she realized Naruto had just used logic to win an argument against her. She loved him like hell, but he wasn't the exactly the sharpest tool in the shed. "Well even a stopped clock is right twice a day."

"Oi, I'm right here!" Naruto had a comical look on his face as if she had spoken her thoughts out loud… oh shit, it was time for damage control.

"Uh, well that concludes this meeting." Tsunade said as she turned around to face the window. "Be sure to report to the ANBU Headquarters at 0300 sharp."

"…Wait, What!?

**Well that concludes Chapter 2. I know this chapter probably wasn't that amusing, but the next few are guaranteed to make you laugh at least once… I mean I can't technically "guarantee" that, but they will at least be funnier than this chapter.**

**On another note, I should have posted this chapter earlier, however, I'm currently in Nigeria, and they have a casual relationship with the electricity and internet connection. That means while I might finish the next chapter early, I won't always post it early. **

**Anyway, Thanks for reading, hope you continue to do so. **


	3. The Trainee

Sorry for the late update. I got sick, and then some things happened in life… well I'm not making any excuses, and I'll try and update more frequently. I want to personally thank **Kurama Thunderstorm **for your support. Sorry it took so long to reply to your review but I live in Nigeria so things like electricity and internet are not exactly constant. Anyway, you came to read, not to listen to me rant about things you guys don't care about. So, on to the show!

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto… I also don't own a car, a plane, a boat, a house, a waterslide, and classic Adidas. What!? I really want those two last things though, the rest are a luxury items.

Chapter three: The Trainee

_**Just Barely ANBU**_

"Can you believe that old hag!? If she actually believes that I'm gonna show up to the ANBU Headquarters at 3am she's got another thing coming!" "Oi, are you even listening to me teme?" Naruto paused long enough in his tirade to look at his best friend.

Sasuke was wearing a dark blue long-sleeved collar shirt with the Uchiha crest on the back, black pants, and black sandals. Sasuke had run into Naruto outside of the Hokage tower, on his way home from a mind-numbing border patrol mission. All he wanted to do was take a shower and sleep, but for some reason Kami was punishing for something he did. Well, he'd find out what he did wrong later and fix it, because surely no one deserved to be punished like this right?

"Of course I'm listening stupid." Sasuke groaned as he turned to his left to stare at his best friend. "I'm sure half of Konoha is listening now too."

Naruto blushed slightly as he looked around to notice that everyone was indeed staring at them. In hind-sight, maybe he shouldn't have been yelling so loudly while using elaborate hand-gestures to paint a picture of what occurred in the meeting. If he wasn't too careful he would attract… shit!

Naruto's expression grew dim as he looked at the position of the sun in the sky before he finally turned to Sasuke. "Sasuke, what time is it?"

"Hmmm? I think it's around 3:50… oh shit!" Sasuke left Naruto talking to his after-image while he bolted full speed down the street toward his house. _"Damn you Naruto!_ _You talk too much. If they catch us together again…"_ Sasuke shuddered as he tried to expel the nasty thought in his head.

"Really! It's like that Teme!?" Naruto yelled besides a distraught Sasuke as he finally caught up to him. "Dude, we fought in a war together, and you're running from some fangirls?"

"Don't talk like this is just my problem, your fan club is out there too."

"Oi, my fan club is awesome. How can you hate anyone that understands my greatness so well?" Naruto flashed a bright smile towards his rival as he remembered his great fan club girls. Yeah, sometimes it was good to be alive. "Plus, its your fan club that does that weird thing anything way. Don't lump my followers in with yours!" Naruto pointed at his friend as he continued to run next to Sasuke at breakneck speeds. "…Why are you so fast?"

"Hmm, continue to waste time talking and I'll leave you behind. I still remembered what happened last time our two groups meet…"

_*Start Flashback*_

_Two months ago…_

"_Oi Teme, they let you out for a walk?" Naruto shouted as he ran toward his friend down the street. "Why didn't you tell me they were letting you out sometime this week when I saw you yesterday?"_

"_So that exactly this sort of thing wouldn't happen." Sasuke mumbled as he slowed down his stride enough to allow Naruto to catch-up with no problem. "Can't you see that I'm enjoying my momentary freedom with some peace and quiet?"_

_Once in a while, Tsunade let Sasuke out his cell, and allowed him to roam the village for some fresh air. Of course, while he was out of his cell, she was placed chakra repression seals on him, and put the gate guards on high alert. After all, she was generous, not stupid. _

"_Aww, come' on don't be like that." Naruto smiled as he swung his right arm over Sasuke's shoulders. "You know you love having me around."_

"_I really don't." Sasuke replied as he removed Naruto's arm from his shoulders with a look of distaste on his face. Sasuke actually didn't mind having Naruto around, I mean they were best friends for a reason, but he would kill himself before he ever admitted that out loud. Naruto was already insufferable as he was now, no need to make things any worse._

_Before their conversation got any further, a group consisting of mainly young girls and women stopped the duo. As soon as Naruto spotted the flag they were holding, he smiled and walked toward the girls._

"_Hey guys, I see there are a few guys mixed into the crowd this time… that's not creepy at all." Naruto gave a half-hearted smile as a large sweat-drop rolled down the back of his head._

"_Hello Naruto-kun." A girl will long blonde hair with bangs around her face and light green eyes stepped forward to greet him. "It's always nice to see you." _

"_WE LOVE YOU NARUTO-KUN!" rang out from the crowd as the flag bearer began to twirl the flag as the continued._

"_Naruto, get over here." Sasuke hissed as he motioned Naruto to come closer. "Why the hell do you know members of your own fan club?" Sasuke asked as Naruto finally got enough to hear his question over the chanting. _

"_Well Yeah." Naruto shrugged as he started to name some of the members in the crowd. "The cute blonde I was talking to is Ami. She's the vice president of my fan club. Not everyone is like you Teme, I actually like women." Naruto faced Sasuke with a smug look on his face as he finished answering his rival's question._

"_Shut it dobe! And if that's the Vice-president, where's the president?"_

"_Oh, Hinata-chan is on a mission right now."_

"…_Wait, Hinata, as in Hinata Hyuga is your fan club president!?"_

"_Yeah, I thought it was weird too, but she told me that she became president in order to keep my fan club from sexual harassing me… kinda like what they do to you. Isn't she really sweet?" _

"…"

"_What?"_

"_I've never met anyone as stupid as you are in my entire life."_

_Before their argument could escalate any further, another group of solely women entered the field waving a similar flag._

"_Oh great, now my fan club is here." Sasuke sighed as he began to rub his forehead in an attempt to ease his growing headache. _

"_HI SASUKE-KUN!" The fan club squealed as they finally got close enough to spot the object of their affection._

"_Ha!" Naruto laughed as he spotted Sasuke's fan club enter the field. "My fan club is bigger than yours. I guess defection did wonders for your popularity."_

"_Will you shut up! Can't you see something serious is about to go down." Sasuke hissed as he pointed in the direction of the two clubs._

_Both Naruto and Sasuke were expecting some sort of fight, or at least an argument from the two groups. What they didn't expect was that the two groups would join forces. It seemed like each group loved the idea of a NaruSasu relationship more than they liked the actually people. _

"_What the Hell is that!" Naruto screeched as he saw the two groups converge into one. "And how the hell did they do that to the flags? Ninjustu isn't supposed to be used like that!" What Naruto was referring to, was the fact that the two flags had somehow combined to create a single flag with a picture of a big heart surrounding the faces of Naruto and Sasuke._

"_Teme, I think its best that we… teme!?"By the time Naruto turned around to tell Sasuke to run, he spotted Sasuke's figure in the distance entering the forest. _

"_You Bastard! You think you can just leave without me!?" Naruto shook his fist towards the distant figure that had now disappeared into the forest. He then took off after Sasuke as he remembered the danger behind him._

"_Get them girls!" The fan club started to chase after the fleeing men right after Naruto fled._

_Soon the only people that were left in the field were the few men that were a part of the Naruto fan club. One of the guys finally spoke after a few minutes of silence._

"…_Maybe this wasn't the best way to meet women."_

_*End Flashback*_

"I remember now you bastard! You left me to die!" Naruto yelled at his rival as they finally entered the Uchiha compound.

"Stop being so dramatic." Sasuke mumbled distracted as he fished for his house keys in his pockets. "Plus they were basically harmless. They're a group comprised of both civilian and ninja a like that have too much free time on their hands."

"Then why did you run so fast?"

"… Go home Naruto." Sasuke growled as he finally opened his front door, and then preceded to shut the door in Naruto's face.

"So you're not going to invite me in!"

"No."

"You really are a bastard." Naruto mumbled as he turned around and began heading home. "I wonder what's on Tv."

*3am: Naruto's bedroom*

"Tsunade-Sama was correct" One voice spoke softly as they stared at the snoring form of the last Uzumaki. "He really had no intention of coming to the headquarters this early."

"Well it's to be expected after reading his profile." Another voice sighed as he continued to stare at the sleeping ninja in disappointment. "It's a shame, I was at least expecting him to be better."

"We came discuss this later" the third voice finally chimed in. "It's time to wake him up."

Three ANBU stood at the foot of Naruto bed and began form hand signs as a fourth voice stopped them dead in their tracks.

"That won't be necessary" Naruto and two clones had Kunai placed on the throat of each ANBU member as the clone that was sleeping in his bed exploded into smoke. "Now tell me who you are, and why you're in my bedroom. You have ten seconds."

"Can't you tell just by looking at us?" The second ANBU spoke up sarcastically. "We're ANBU!"

"You're not very smart are you?" Naruto's voice was cold, and the killing intent in the room began to rise. "You're provoking someone that has a kunai to your throat. Besides, just because you're dressed in ANBU attire, doesn't mean you can't be impostures."

The third ANBU raised his hands in a disarming notion, and slowly turned around to face his captor. This ANBU had a falcon mask, and seemed to have seniority over the other two members.

"You've every right to be wary Naruto-san. It's not good for a ninja to be too trusting, but I have a seal by the Hokage validating us as ANBU." He then reached into his vest and handed the clone a scroll with the Hokage's seal on top.

After verifying the seal, the clone nodded to his boss, and disappeared in a puff of smoke. The other clone followed in suit, while the original Naruto let go of his captured ANBU.

"So what do you guys want? It's a little early for a mission." Naruto asked as he studied the other two ANBU. The first one appeared to be a woman with chopped brown hair, and an average stature. She was wearing a zebra mask as well as what seemed to be a slightly modified version of the ANBU uniform. The second ANBU was wearing a mask that resembled a parrot. He was slightly taller than Naruto, and had messy black hair that only reached his ears.

"Congratulations Naruto Uzumaki, by order of the fifth Hokage you have been inducted into the ANBU training program effective immediately." The falcon masked ANBU stepped forward to hand Naruto a storage scroll. "This scroll contains your new uniform and supplies you will be using during your training. Please note that you are not currently an ANBU member, but merely a trainee until further notice."

Naruto twirled the scroll absent-mindedly as he absorbed all the information that was presented to him. "Alright," Naruto yawned as it was apparent that he wasn't going back to sleep anytime soon. "When do we start?"

**And that's a rap! Chapter 3 took much longer to finish than I thought it would. I planned to have this out weeks ago, but I lost track of time. You can expect the next chapter within a week, I don't intend to take this long for another chapter again. Anyway, Naruto begins ANBU training next chapter, and we catch up with some of the other rookie nine members as well. Feel free to ask any questions or make any comments. Till next time Aku knight signing out!**


	4. The first of many trials

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto or his merry band of friends. I also don't own money that is associated with owning a manga like Naruto. Not that anyone really cares….

Chapter 4: Crash course

_**Just Barely ANBU**_

There are a lot of words you could use characterize Naruto. He was loyal to a fault. If you were his friend, then you had a friend for life. He was honest. It might be because he was a fairly terrible liar, but honest is honest. And most importantly he was powerful. There are few ninja that can stand up to the force of a sage master, or a Jinchuuriki that has full control over the chakra of the tailed beast sealed within. Naruto has successfully done both. So to say that he was just powerful, was an understatement. But nobody ever accused Naruto of being patient.

"Why the hell am I still up here!? This is a waste of time. The target isn't even doing anything!" Naruto yelled into his headset. Naruto had spent the last two days in a tree watching what seemed to be a civilian, do nothing but sit in the middle of a training field.

While staring at the middle-aged balding man in the center of the training field, Naruto began to remember the events that led him up to this point.

**** 2 Days Ago****

After Naruto changed into the ANBU uniform, sans the mask, he left his apartment with the three ANBU and proceeded to head straight to the ANBU headquarters. Once there, the zebra and parrot masked ANBU left without a word and the remaining ANBU began to relay instructions.

"This is the ANBU headquarters, whenever you are summoned for training or practice missions, you are to report to this destination immediately. Are there any questions?"

"Yeah, what the hell should I call you?" Naruto asked as he waited for the ANBU to finish before asking his questions. "I mean I can't just go around calling you "pigeon guy" can I?"

"This is a falcon mask!" the ANBU hissed angrily.

"Really? Coz it looks like a pigeon." Naruto shrugged as he made his comment.

"… Never mind. For the duration of this exercise, you can call me Tori." It seemed like the file was right. Naruto really had a talent for picking sore spots. Anyway, it was time to move on. "Any other questions before we start the first exercise of the day?"

"Yeah, I got several." Naruto drawled as he began to lose interest in talking to the ANBU in front of him, and started to study the ANBU headquarters.

The ANBU Headquarters looked like it belonged in the commercial district, as opposed to be stationed behind the Hokage tower. The first thing Naruto noticed about the building was that it was very plain. The outside of the building was painted a light brown color, and the windows were boarded up. It was about four stories in height, and seemed to be quite wide, aside from that, it was like any other building he saw in the village.

"Am I going to be staying here from now on? And why the hell couldn't you wait till morning to make these introductions!"

Tori took a deep breath and answered the questions Naruto asked. "No, you will not being staying here. This is only the operations central. Contrary to what you might think, ANBU often do not move out of their apartments and houses, and move in. That kind of movement would cause people to ask questions that could compromise the identity of an ANBU member. Second, you are currently too well-known to suddenly "up-root" you from your home. If you were to suddenly go missing for an extended period of time, people would come looking for you."

Tori paused slightly to check to see if Naruto had digested the information he had just presented to him. Naruto wasn't going to be trained to be a typical ANBU member; rather he was going to be used as a show of force. So basically the conventional methods were not going to apply to him.

"Now to answer your second question," Tori began again once Naruto nodded his head in understanding. "It is essential for any Shinobi to be able to operate at an efficient efficiency regardless of the hour."

"…. Okay, this time in English please." Naruto had a deadpan expression on his face after hearing the explanation to his second question. For the life of him, he couldn't understand why people felt the need to explain things using such complicated words. Naruto knew he wasn't the sharpest tool in his pouch, but why explain things using such complex words, when there were smaller words that explain the same thing? Now that's food for thought!

"Well, basically it means that you should be prepared at all hours."

"You couldn't say that to begin with? I feel like you just wasted five minutes of my day!"

The only thing that was preventing Tori from slapping his forehead in frustration was his years of training. This kid was impossible, and if he wasn't so sure he would lose, he would've attacked him already. "_Well, at least the drill sergeant is going to put him through hell_." Tori thought to himself, as he began to smile behind his mask.

"Uh, you know I'm not interested in guys right?"

Naruto's voice broke Tori out of his daydream. He immediately noticed the disturbed look on Naruto's face, and deduced that he had probably been staring. What had been even more embarrassing was that Tori had just finished explaining to Naruto that Shinobi needed to be alert at all times. So either he explain that he was daydreaming, or let Naruto believe he was gay. It wasn't even a decision.

"I was, uh testing you. Yeah, I just wanted to see if you were the type to get easily intimated by others. Don't worry, you pass!" Or there was always option three… lie your ass off.

"… yeah, I don't believe you. So you're going to walk in front from now on, so you don't stare at my ass on the way to our next stop."

White hot rage filled Tori's being as he looked at the Jinchuuriki in front of him. How dare he insinuate that he liked men. And even if he did, surely he could do better than Naruto Uzumaki! Yeah… he could probably even land a date with someone like Sasuke Uchiha.

"What are you daydreaming about pigeon guy?" Naruto asked as he noticed that the ANBU had began staring into space again.

"I was just thinking that I could much better than… Shit!" Tori cursed as he almost revealed his borderline homosexual thoughts. Worse yet, he could see the grin on Naruto face as he lost composure, the brat was toying with him! "That's it! Orders be damned, I'm going to show you why exactly I earned the position of beta squad captain." Red charka in the form of claws surrounded Tori's forearms as he took a low stance.

"Finally, the battle portion of the exam! I was starting to get bored." Naruto began to bounce around on his feet to loosen up his body. "I'll try not to make this too quick."

XxX

(Elsewhere with Team 10)

"…Tsk troublesome." Shikamaru grumbled as he watched his best friend Choji devour another plate of BBQ. "There goes my B-rank mission pay."

"Oh stop whining Shika, last week Choji ate through all my shopping money. At least you didn't have any plans for your money." Ino huffed as she rested her head on her hands and continued to stare at Choji as he finished yet another round of food. A few years ago she would have been disgusted by how one of her best friends was eating, but she was completely used to it by now. It's funny the things you get used to over time.

"Don't worry Shikamaru, next week is my turn to pay, so you can eat as much as you like!" Choji grinned as he had stopped eating long enough to join in on the present conversation.

Ever since Asuma died on that mission against Akatsuki, Team 10 had made a silent promise to try and eat at Asuma's favorite BBQ restaurant at least once a week in remembrance of him. Usually they'd only be able to meet up once in a while due to an influx of recon missions they had been assigned to in Earth country, however, things had slowed down somewhat of recent.

"…Yeah Choji, that's what I was worried about, not getting enough to eat." Shikamaru mumbled sarcastically as he looked at the grinning face of his best friend. Even when he was supposed to be annoyed, Shikamaru could never stay mad at Choji for very long. Choji was a kind heart, and never really did things to purposely irritate you; he was kind of like Naruto in that way. Speaking of Naruto…

"Hey, have either of you guys seen Naruto lately? I have a mission coming up and I wanted to recruit him." Shikamaru turned to face his teammates as he wondered about the whereabouts of his friend.

"Naruto? I remember seeing at Ichiraku the other day. He caused a scene in front of the store, then Sakura dragged him off somewhere. Then I had 3 Extra large portions of pork Ramen followed by…." As Choji had started to drift further away from the important parts of the conversation, Shikamaru and Ino blocked him out and continued where he left off before he started to daydream.

"Oh yeah, I remember now." Ino hummed as she tapped her head with her index finger. "I saw forehead yesterday and she told me what happened at Ichiraku. You know, Naruto is pretty rude sometimes, you should really talk to him about how he talks to women. Well, he has gotten kinda handsome recently so I suppose..."

This was the problem Shikamaru faced whenever he asked his teammates a question. He loved them both, but they tended to drift into their own worlds as soon as the conversation lasted longer than a few minutes.

"…Troublesome." Shikamaru grumbled his favorite word as he tried to get Ino to focus on the topic at hand. "Ino, focus! You were telling me about where Naruto is."

Ino paused mid rant to realize she had gotten off topic. She rubbed the back of her head embarrassed and continued from where she left off. "Yeah, I was getting to that. Well the short version is that Sakura said something about him joining ANBU."

Shikamaru paused as he digested the information. "What would ANBU want with Naruto?"

*** Present time ***

(ANBU Training field)

Apparently that was not the best time to fight a commanding officer. Not only had the fight been broken up before he could really get into it, Naruto had been punished for fighting outside of the ANBU headquarters and was given this "trial" as punishment. He didn't even know what he was supposed to do! All he had been told was to watch the target for any unusual activities. The only thing that was unusual here was him for sitting in a tree for two days as he basically peeped on an old man. This was disgusting!

"That's it, I'm outta here." Naruto whispered as he finally left his spot in the tree and descended down toward the ground. "First I'm going to get some Ramen, and then I'll go find Sakura-Chan and see what she's up to…" Naruto stopped for a second on his way out of the training field and took a deep breath as he stretched out of his sore limbs. "Yeah, maybe I should shower first." Naruto mumbled to himself as he got a whiff of his clothes. "Yup, definitely a shower first."'

"Halt!" A voice rang out through the field that made Naruto stop mid step.

An ANBU member appeared in front of him in a whirlwind of leaves and wind. He was taller than Naruto by a few inches and had short black hair that was well kept. The two main differences between this man and other ANBU members were instead of wrist guards with a hidden blade attached to each wrist; instead, this man wore silver and black gauntlets. The other was his mask.

In Konoha, the leader of each military department was represented by a mythological creature. There were three military departments in Konoha to date. The first is the I&amp;T department. The symbol for the department is said to be a symbol of Cerberus, The three headed guard dog said to guard the gates of Hell. The second is the Reconnaissance department… he didn't remember what the symbol for that department was, but he was sure it wasn't as badass as the other two were. And lastly, the ANBU. The ANBU were lead by a man that wore a dragon mask. Dragons; the most powerful mythical creature to date, and the man that wore that mask was right in front of him.

"How can I help ANBU Commander?" Naruto asked as he suddenly he realized why he was so anxious. This man was one of Konoha's most powerful Shinobi. He had once been told by Neji, that if Naruto hadn't defeated Pain, it might have been this man. He really wanted to fight this guy!

"At ease ANBU recruit Uzumaki Naruto, registration number: 00101392, Alias: Naruto the…"

"Ahhh, no need for all of that!" Naruto interrupted before the commander could say that stupid nickname. He was really going to have to do something about that terrible name.

"As I was saying before I was interrupted," The ANBU commander continued where he left off. " I usually don't come here to speak personally to new recruits, but you've done Konoha a great service these past few years, and I wanted to personally meet "Konoha's newest Hero." The commander trailed off as he extended his hand to shake Naruto's.

Naruto rubbed his head in embarrassment and shook the commander's hand. After all this time he still wasn't used to people seeing him as a hero, he was just doing what he thought was right.

"Now to this business portion of this encounter" The commander continued after he finished shaking hands with Naruto. "I see you just finished the first portion of the many trials that are to come."

"Trials?" Naruto asked as he scratched his head in confusion. "I was told this was some sort of punishment for fighting with that pigeon masked guy.

"No, that was not a punishment." The commander answered as he continued on to his first point. "This trial was designed to see if you could 1) follow orders without question, and 2) to see if you had the patience and fortitude required to be in ANBU."

"You mean I sat in a tree for two days just to see if I could follow orders!" Naruto's voice began to rise as he realized he had just be tested without his knowledge. Didn't they read his service record?... Oh damn, maybe they read his service records.

"Make no mistake Uzumaki, the ANBU only takes those that prove themselves capable to us, not to anyone else." The commander's voice began to sound colder as he continued. "Each trial is designed for every new recruit regardless of his stature, or abilities. These trials help us to determine whether or not you have what it takes to be an ANBU. There will be missions that require you to watch an enemy combatant, or a civilian for days at a time with barely any rest in between. And sometimes, you will be given orders to do things that would make you sick to your stomach, but we do it so that others don't have to, so that others can live in peace."

The commander trailed off as he finished his speech. He looked at Naruto and studied his expression before continuing in a smooth and even tone. "Are you ready for that kind of commitment? Are you ready to serve Konoha with every fiber in your body?"

The commander didn't even need an answer, he could see it in Naruto's eyes as clear as day. He smiled beneath his mask and his tone softened. Good, he was exactly the kind of man that Hokage-sama had described him as.

"Come back here tomorrow at 0800 sharp. We'll commence the second trial then."

"What's the second trial?" Naruto finally spoke up, as he had kept competently silent during the commander's speech.

"Tomorrow is the combat portion of your exam. Usually you'd be pitted against another ANBU recruit, or sometimes even an actual ANBU member, but in your case, I'm making a special exception."

"Oh, then who will I be facing tomorrow?" Naruto asked as he appeared puzzled by the commander's comment. He didn't seem like that kind of guy that made exceptions.

"You'll be facing me." The commander grinned as he disappeared in the same manner he appeared.

Things had not really be going Naruto's way the past couple of days. He'd been beaten up by one of his best friends, drafted to ANBU without his consent, woken up in the middle of the night, and he had just spent the last two days in a tree doing nothing. Finally, things were looking up for him.

"I can't wait." Naruto grinned as he made his way out of the training field. Tomorrow was going to be a good day.

**I'm so sorry for the delay in Chapter 4. It's been half finished for over a month now, and it kind of just sat there on my computer. I should have posted this like a month ago, and I don't even have a good excuse why I didn't. I also wasn't terribly happy with this chapter either, but I didn't want to waste even more time by re-writing the whole chapter. Hopefully the next chapter is better, and it shouldn't take too long before I release chapter 5. **

**Thanks for reading, if you have comments, questions or anything you'd like to say, please leave a review. It'll motivate me if I can at least get up to 10 reviews. **

**Till next Time.**


	5. Not a real update yet!

Not A Real update yet!

**This isn't an update, but it's an apology. Its been over a year since I've updated my story and I don't even have a good reason why I didn't. I guess I lost motivation and confidence in myself, but by not at least trying I've become the very same type of author I hate on this website. You know the authors that write fantastic stories then just drop off the face of the earth when it starts getting good. Even If only one person reads this story it should have been enough. So thank you guys for your support. I'll start writing something this weekend and hopefully it'll be out within a few days. **

**Aku-knight **


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